Flower ordering service?

Mike GristLife Leave a Comment

A full, knackering day today of decorating, shopping, exercise, sanding down tiles (photos soon), using polyfilla for holes, and tidying up, that was kicked off with this long and tortuous exchange- re: our broadband is down.

Broadband fiasco (9-10am)

  • I called to our broadband provider and try to arrange an engineer visit to fix the fault on the line. End up trapped in an automatic voice recognition computer loop for 30 minutes, asking me if I want to book Monday or Tuesday (only- which I couldn’t do) despite calling and recalling multiple times trying to lie my way to a real human. Nope- I was sent to that loop every time I identified myself. Ultimately call a different number, go through the new sales line, get them to transfer me to technical, and then try to arrange the visit.
  • The guy says weekdays only. OK, I work on weekdays. He says, maybe we can do from 6:30pm. OK let’s do that. I add, is there any compensation for my inconvenience? He says, that’ll be sorted out. I say, is that it? I’ve been trapped in your automatic system for 30 minutes. He says- do we really want to make this call any longer?
  • Taken aback. I say- yes. I’m being civil. I can see you’re frustrated, you’ve got to understand I’m more frustrated than you, as I’ve been trapped. I want to know how the company’s going to compensate me for the inconvenience of my internet being down.
  • He says, I’m being civil (with rising tone of impatience).
  • Me- OK, tell me your name.
  • My name’s Michael.
  • Really? (That’s my name!) What’s your last name?
  • I can’t tell you that. It’s a privacy issue.
  • Seriously?
  • Yes.
  • So what about some ID number?
  • It’s company policy I don’t release that information.
  • I doubt that. But ok- so you won’t help me with compensation, and you won’t tell me your name. Please connect me to your supervisor. Can you do that?
  • I can. Plinking and aggressive typing sounds.
  • Michael what are you doing? …. Michael?
  • Line transfers. Automatic message. It is the flower-ordering system for a completely different company. And to add insult to injury- they’re not even open on Saturday.
  • Whaaat?
  • Me- cheeky bastard. Not giving up though, keen to see if I can get some decent behaviour out of this company. I don’t expect it, but am curious. Much service from them, and others in similar service positions, has been poor, and the last time I lost my temper. This time I’m going to stay calm and just keep going bull-headedly.
  • Call the complaint line. The guy answers. I explain how I was sent to get flowers. He apologizes and says- that shouldn’t have happened. How crazy that this immediately makes me feel better. Somebody agrees that you’ve been treated poorly and you feel justified. He looks into the situation. At this point I am thinking the previous guy didn’t even book me an engineer visit, so I ask about that.
  • No. No visit booked. No record of my call. No notes in the file.
  • Whaaat? Who was I talking to?
  • I’m sorry sir I don’t know.
  • Well I definitely spoke to someone. I should start recording these calls (after hearing their automated message tell me many times that they were recording me).
  • I can book you in now.
  • We got it booked. The complaint is in the system.

Phew. I’m sure everyone has been through something like this. At least I got some satisfaction in the end, and successfully booked- but really, who did I talk to? And why a flower-ordering service? It seems more effort for him than just hanging up.

BUT- I keep my cool :). So we’re all good. And the kitchen floor tiles have been sanded by us skating around on sheets of sandpaper like Mao Asada (Japanese figure-skater) ready to be primed and painted tomorrow. Progress was made. I am at peace.


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